Tuesday, March 31, 2020

Though: I hate Myself


I always said "I hate myself". I hate being myself that to much extrovert, I hate it when I choose to be quite, people tend to say "This is not you". I hate myself when I try to ensure what people said can be done, but end up the person disappears, but still I keep repeat. I hate when I caring too much but they do not care. I hate when I think they are my friend but the real is not.  I hate when I try to take care of their hearts until I forgot mine.



Some people said, "I want to be you", "You have everything", "You can speak with everyone", "You can do everything". Deep inside in my mind, I think it is hard. I need to keep maintain with people expectation. I need to ensure my performance is good. I need be the best. 

Yes, I am being myself, but sometimes I always think what other people think. I am scared but I need rest from be what people expect.

When people said , Being me is the best. I said it is wrong, I hate myself.


Am I wrong for having all of this feelings?  

2 comments:

  1. I kinda feel you. No matter how much we hate ourselves, it's up to us to make it up for it.
    Take a break. It's okay to not be you once in a while. Breathe a different air. Do something different.
    When you're ready, come back. Be you and don't let others define you.
    You don't need to care about what other people say about you because they don't know what you've been through, what you're feeling and maybe don't even know you even though they thought they know you.
    The one who knows best about you is yourself. Cheer up. You can do this. ^^

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Ray, your words are mean a lot to me!

      Delete

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